Navigating Grief: Understanding and Embracing the Healing Journey

Grief is a universal experience that touches everyone at some point in their lives, yet it remains one of the most misunderstood and taboo subjects in society. How to deal with grief is not a lesson we are taught by our parents as we grow but it should be. In the latest interview of Travel Time Stories, host Shannon and co-host Ann welcome grief educator Lisa Rites to discuss the intricacies of grief, particularly in relation to divorce and emotional loss. This conversation sheds light on how to carry grief with compassion and understanding.

Understanding Grief: A Broader Perspective

Grief is often narrowly defined as a response to death, but as Lisa Rites eloquently points out, it encompasses so much more. Grief can stem from various life changes, including divorce, identity shifts, and loss of future expectations. Lisa emphasizes that grief is not something to be "gotten over" but learned to carry alongside our joys. For example, she shares her own journey, highlighting how her career as a respiratory therapist exposed her to the realities of grief long before she personally experienced it through her parents' deaths and her divorce.

The Stages of Grief: A Personal Journey

Lisa discusses the common stages of grief—anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—drawing from her own experiences during her divorce. She candidly describes her initial anger and the realization that her ex-husband was not leaving their children but rather their marriage. This understanding marked a significant turning point in her grieving process. Lisa’s journey illustrates that it's normal to cycle through these emotions multiple times, showing that grief is not linear.

The Importance of Support

One of the key takeaways from this episode is the importance of support when navigating grief. Lisa advises listeners to simply be present for those in grief. Instead of offering clichéd reassurances like "time heals all wounds," she encourages friends and family to listen and allow their loved ones to express their feelings without judgment. This approach fosters a safe space for healing and understanding.

Recognizing Invisible Grief

Invisible grief can be particularly isolating. Lisa highlights that many people may not realize they are grieving due to societal misconceptions about what grief looks like. For instance, feelings of sadness after a significant life transition, such as moving away from friends or adjusting to a new family dynamic post-divorce, are valid forms of grief that deserve acknowledgment.

Grief and Divorce: A Unique Challenge

Divorce is a common yet often minimized form of grief. Lisa discusses the emotional losses involved, including the loss of shared dreams and the redefinition of family roles. She emphasizes that even in the context of a difficult relationship, grief is valid. The struggles individuals face in recognizing their grief can lead to feelings of shame, especially if they initiated the separation. However, Lisa encourages people to embrace their feelings and understand that grieving is a natural response to loss.

Finding Joy Amidst Grief

A poignant aspect of grief is the coexistence of joy and sorrow. Lisa shares her experience attending her daughter's wedding shortly after her father's passing, illustrating how moments of joy can trigger waves of grief. She stresses that it is possible to hold grief and joy simultaneously, allowing individuals to celebrate life while honoring their losses. This duality is part of the healing journey.

Conclusion: Key Takeaways

Navigating grief is a deeply personal experience that requires patience and understanding. From recognizing the broader definitions of grief to embracing the complexities of emotions during significant life changes, the insights shared in this episode provide valuable guidance for anyone facing loss. Remember that grief is not something to be rushed; it’s a journey to be walked with compassion and support. Always take the time to acknowledge your feelings and seek help when needed.

Tune in to Travel Time Stories with Shannon on March 2nd for the full interview with Lisa Rites! 

You can visit Lisa's website to learn more about her and get a copy of her book "Navigating Grief and Divorce".